Pregnancy FAQ – All the important questions covered.

This is funny for two types of people. Those who have given birth and those who have been born. But especially the former.

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9 Things Every Parent Should Pray

Tags

children, Family, Job, parents, Prayer, prayer requests, spiritual welfare

The Easter season is a busy time in church life, and I’ve had little time or energy to devote to blogging.  Here is a repost from several years ago titled, “It May Be.”

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One of the great intercessory ministries we can engage in is “praying for our children.” Not just our physical children, but the youth and children of our church. Many do not come from homes that seek to glorify God, and are in need of “surrogate” spiritual parents.

Job was so concerned about his children that he offered sacrifices on their behalf. He said, “It may be that my sons have sinned.” He understood the potential dangers that they faced. Our church youth and children face dangers as well.

1) The Danger of Religious Familiarity - Knowing the role so well that they are able to act it out perfectly while having nothing on the inside. A Biblical example of this is the sons of Eli. They were so well versed in the functions of the temple that they were serving as priests, yet God judged them, their father, their family, and their nation because of their wickedness.

2) The Danger of Social Corruption - A society that not only tolerates iniquity, but promotes it, is a dangerous environment for “church” kids. There is more access, understanding, and encouragement of sin today than at any time in recent history. Biblical Example: Lot’s daughters.

3) The Danger of Foolish Behavior - Let’s face it. We all do stupid things, and kids are no exception. I’m sure we all did plenty of foolish things when we were young! We should pray that God protect them from their own foolishness (wouldn’t be a bad idea to make the same request for ourselves!). Even the wisest man in the Bible had a fool for a son. Rehoboam was the recipient of the teaching of Proverbs, yet the first thing he did as king was the most foolish.

4) The Danger of Persuasive Friends - Whether it’s a boyfriend persuading a girl, or vice versa, this is an age old problem. Good kids do things they would never otherwise have done, if they had not been talked into it by their “friends”. From sex to drugs to crime, “bad company corrupts good manners.” David’s son provides a perfect scriptural example. “Amnon had a friend” who persuaded him to do what his conscience and teaching told him was wrong. The result was the loss of his life.

5) The Danger of Sinful Flesh - Beyond all the outward influences to do wrong, every person ever born has a sinful nature. Parents say, “But I trust my child.” You can trust them to be human. Put anyone in the right situation at the right time and they will act accordingly. Only one person ever withstood all temptation, and His name wasn’t yours or mine.

Besides praying against these dangers, what can we pray for?

1. Pray for them to have a genuine spiritual relationship.

2. Pray for them to have Godly wisdom in their actions, words, and relationships.

3. Pray for them to grow spiritually into true mature disciples of Jesus Christ.

4. Pray for God to reveal ways that you can be a spiritual parent to disciple the children and youth God has placed around you.

These should be the prayer burden of every adult believer, not just those who have children of their own. “It may be” that they will fall into these traps. Let’s make sure that if it happens, it was in spite of what we did, not because of it.

Why You Should Raise Your Children . . . Where You Live

Tags

children, evangelicalism, Family, Kathy Keller, latent elitism, rural, urban, urbanophilia

Last week, Christianity Today published Kathy Keller’s article Why You Should Raise Your Kids in the City. In it, she argues that the city is not only acceptable, it is a “wonderful place to raise children.”

Her premise is that “Because most Christians don’t think about the city as a great place to raise their family, Christians are moving into the city at a vastly slower rate than the rest of the world’s people.” While I can think of other reasons this might be the case, it is certainly a primary factor for many.

Mrs. Keller speaks from experience. For 23 years, she and her husband Tim, serve the Redeemer Presbyterian Church in Manhattan. They raised three sons in New York City. That certainly qualifies her as an authority on the subject, and she makes some excellent points. The perception of the city is not usually “family-friendly”, and this article helps dispel that myth.

via mamnaimie @ flickr

What I find vaguely unsettling are some of the “Reasons to Love City Living” attached at the end of the article. Some that are merely misconceptions:

*you do things with your kids, rather than sending them out to play in the yard
In the country we do things with our kids AND let them play in the yard (what’s wrong with playing alone in the yard anyway?) Ultimately, this probably has more to do with parenting rather than location.

*great food in every restaurant—no bad meals
Because delicious restaurant-served food is essential to raising Godly kids. Take them to Golden Corral and you may forfeit their soul. (OK. Bad example. That may actually be true.) Obviously, Mrs. Keller hasn’t been to the cities I’ve been too. We have great food in the country, we just don’t always go to a restaurant to get it!

These aren’t all that troubling, just incongruous in an article intending to destroy stereotypes.

Other reasons are more troubling:

* you are able to process the sinfulness of the world, which is up close and visible in the city, with your children; they aren’t shielded from it until just as they are leaving home and you are no longer as much an influence in their lives.

What is insinuated here is that children raised in a less exposed environment will somehow be less than prepared for life. Again, I agree that a child can be raised well in an ungodly environment. The problem is in suggesting that it is inherently superior to do so.

* The best reason to raise kids in the city: they see young, hip, urban Christians in the church, new believers who have been there and done that and find Christ better than all of it;

Rather than being the best, this may be the most disturbing for me. First, it seems to elevate “young, hip, urban,” as necessary qualifications for a role model. Further it implies that the best (though not only) models for our children are those with a negative testimony. I fully understand the value of hearing a warning from someone who has “been there and done that.” I am not convinced I must live in the city to encounter those with a “past.” Nor am I convinced however that it is somehow more valuable than my children seeing someone who has been faithful to Christ their entire life.

photo via KOMUnews @ flickr

Though Mrs. Keller acknowledges there are spiritual pros and cons for raising children in any region, all of this subtly hints at the latent elitism of evangelicalism’s current infatuation with cities (dare I call it urbanophilia?). It might also explain why I found this article or at least the concluding list vaguely unsettling. I’ve expressed my feelings on this trend in regards to ministry, and my feelings are the same for the family.

Neither urban, rural, or suburban is somehow superior. Our countryside may not be cool in secular terms, and we are a long way from hip and urban. But God has called me to serve in a rural area, and that is where I should raise my children for His glory.

Do I have the faith to accept interruptions?

Tags

Faith, Family, interruptions

When we give our day to God, even the interruptions are His.

God reminded me of this in a recent conversation with my 7 year old. I was trying to soften the disappointment of a cancelled trip to the park.

Me to Dylan: I’m sorry. I had planned for us to go to the park and have fun this afternoon. I was looking forward to some time with you, but my day’s plans have had to change. Sometimes things come up that can’t be helped.

Dylan: That’s why we just have to trust God.

Oh, for the faith of a little child!

Have you ever had an unexpected change of plans that turned out to be a blessing? How did you respond to it?

Legacy: Windsor Castle Park

Some time ago my wife and I spent two very restful days in Smithfield, Va.  Across the street from our lodging, we enjoyed walking through the Windsor Castle Park. Joseph Luter, III, founder and former CEO of Smithfield Foods, invested 7.2 million dollars in over 200 acres of land, developed this beautiful park, and donated it to the town.

The story of this generous gift sparked my thinking about legacy. Not in the sense of being remembered or honored, but about lasting benefit for those I love. I want to leave behind memories and values that will be a blessing.

People will be able to enjoy this park far into the future. Children not yet born may walk along its paths and trails. I had to ask myself, What am I leaving behind that will have a lasting benefit?  How much time do I invest in things of value/waste on the trivial? What will be my legacy?

How about you? What is the most important thing you’d like to leave behind for your family, church, or community?

Three-Notch’d, Trail-blazing, and a Faithful Father

Tags

History, Three Chopt, Three Notch'd

Not far from where I live is a road named Three Notch’d Road.   Running east-west from Richmond to the Shenandoah Valley, this historical route likely began as an Indian and game trail and was used by colonists as early as the 1730s.

Jack Jouett rode along this road to warn Thomas Jefferson, Patrick Henry and others in the Virginia Assembly of the approaching British army.  Marquis de Lafayette would camp his French troops along its route. Generations of colonists would travel it on their way to and from the mountains.

The unusual name (also called Three Chopt Road) comes from the practice of the pioneer surveyors marking the direction of trails by cutting notches into trees along the path. (This technique is still used today, though colors are more often used than markings.)  With their axes, they would “blaze” the trail for others to follow.  Their labor would serve as a guide for generations after them.

My Dad is a trail-blazer.  He recently celebrated fifty years of Christian ministry.  Through these years he has marked a path for his children and grandchildren to follow – not with axe or knife, but with his faithfulness to God.  Through his consistent testimony and passion for God, he has left “blazes” along the journey of faith to aid those of us who follow his steps.

Happy Father’s Day to my Dad and all the other Fathers who are leaving a well-marked path.

*For a more detailed history of this road: The Route of the Three Notch’d Road

Unreality TV

Do you remember when T.V. was enjoyable because it was unrealistic?

I’m tired of surfing through:

People’s personal struggles with their weight loss.
Families with various combinations of multiple children.
Obscenely large tumors being removed.
Awkward moments in first dates.
B-list celebrities embarrassing themselves while achieving mediocre success in dancing, singing, athletics, etc.
People with weird collections, habits, or spouses.
Conniving, cheating, lying people (that you wouldn’t want to know in real life) in ridiculous competitions.

Whatever happened to:

Cars that jumped rivers,
Lawyers that seldom (if ever) lost,
Defendants that were always innocent,
Good guys that always finished first,
Policemen that always caught the bad guy (and weren’t bad themselves),
White hat wearing cowboys that could ride a horse, play a guitar and sing all at the same time – not to mention shoot more than six times without reloading,
Parents that always had wise advice, knew what to do, and did what was right,
Animals with abilities that bordered on the miraculous/ridiculous,
Sitcoms that were actually funny?

I could go on . . . but I won’t. Some show about an obese, polygamous family that’s hoarding cheesepuffs to feed their 27 children is about to come on TLC. Can’t miss that.

What do you miss about the good ol’ days of Unreality TV?